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40 Dirty Mormon Dad Jokes And Puns For Adults In 2024

by Hazel

Mormon dad jokes are a unique blend of humor that reflect the values and culture of the Latter-day Saint community. These jokes are wholesome, family-friendly, and often infused with a touch of religious or cultural reference. They are meant to bring smiles and laughter without crossing boundaries. In this article, we will explore 40 unique Mormon dad jokes, each one crafted to bring a bit of joy to your day.

Adult Mormon Jokes

1. How do you know you’re at a Mormon wedding?
The bride isn’t pregnant but her mother is!

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2. Why is dark humor like the second anointing?
Not everyone gets it.

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3. What do you call a Mormon who likes to smoke, drink, swear, and have sex with strangers?
An oxymormon.

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4. What do Mormons play instead of “F*ck, Marry, Kill”?
Marry, Marry, Marry.

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5. Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
A Mormon!
A Mor—
Actually, we are the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and it’s really offensive when you call us Mormon.

6. Why do Mormon women stop having babies at 35?
Because 36 would be too many.

7. Yo mama so Mormon, she was pregnant at her daughter’s wedding.

8. Did you hear about the Mormon cat?
He had nine wives.

9. A Mormon was having an affair with a 15-year-old girl who had lied about her age, when he learned the truth he broke it off, and over the next few weeks guilt set in and he confessed to his wife.
She screamed at him, “How could you cheat on me like that with an older woman!?!?!?”.

10. Why did the Mormon cross the road?
To get to the other bride.

11. What do you call a man who has 5 dishwashers?
A Mormon.

12. Why did the prostitute join the Mormon church?
She wanted a high paying missionary position.

13. How do you stop a Mormon guest from drinking all your booze?
Invite another Mormon.

14. Yo mama so Mormon, she thinks the missionary position is a church calling.

15. Why do Mormons get married on Black Friday?
Because they get 2 for 1.

16. Why did the man convert to Mormonism?
Because he wanted to have his Kate, and Edith, too!

17. How are Mormons better than Catholics?
They marry the children before they molest them!

18. A Mormon president would face the most difficult issue any president has.
Deciding who’s the First Lady, who’s the Second Lady, and who’s the Third Lady.

19. What’s the difference between Mormons and Baptists?
Baptists say hello to each other in the liquor store.

20. What do you get when you cross a Hell’s Angel with a Mormon?
Somebody that comes to your house and tells you to f*ck off.

21. Yo mama so mormon, she swears sex is better with garments on.

22. What does the Mormon girl do when someone brings alcohol to the party?
Puts her clothes back on and goes home.

See Also: TOP 40 GAMING DAD JOKES FOR FATHER’S DAY

23. Why can’t you take a Mormon speed dating?
He’ll start pushing all the tables together.

24. Did you hear about the Mormon drummer who married 4 women with the same name?
Anna 1
Anna 2
Anna 1,2,3,4.

25. How many 13-year-old girls would it take to satisfy Joe Smith?
Joe Smith: How many ya got?

26. A Mormon family is checking into a hotel. The father says, “I hope the p*rn in this room is disabled.”
“No, it’s just regular, you weirdo.”

27. Yo mama so Mormon she only started washing the whites and darks together after 1978.

28. What do you call a bunch of Mormons in a burning building?
S’mormons.

29. Did you know the first Mormon was actually Jamaican?
He had one wife but he wanted more, mon.

30. What do you call a young Mormon couple having sex in the pool?
Soaking wet.

31. Mormons should be called More-mums because they marry lots of women.
This is the english spelling of the joke.

32. What do you call the last child born in a Mormon family?
10/10.

33. What do tweakers and Mormons have in common?
They both ride bikes and go on missions.

34. What do you call a Mormon gynecologist?
A “box” elder.

35. What’s the worst part of being a Mormon vegan?
You get double the guilt after oral sex.

36. Why can’t you circumcise a Mormon?
Because there’s no end to those pricks.

37. What 2 things can’t Mormons drink?
Teancum.

38. Why do Mormons hate the gays so much?
They fly a bunch of rainbows every year and scare Jesus off from the second coming.

39. How do you recognize a pedophilic Mormon?
From the holes in their pillow cases.

40. What’s the difference between a Mormon man and a Muslim man?
A Mormon man gets 72 virgins and THEN kills himself.

Conclusion

Mormon dad jokes encapsulate the warmth, faith, and family-oriented nature of the Latter-day Saint community. They offer a lighthearted way to connect, bringing smiles through humor that resonates with the values and teachings of the church. These jokes not only entertain but also foster a sense of unity and joy among families and friends. Next time you need a wholesome laugh or a cheerful conversation starter, remember these Mormon dad jokes and share the happiness!

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