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40 Funny Queen Jokes You Can’t Share With Royal Family

by Hazel

Laughter is a universal language, and when it comes to humor, everyone enjoys a good joke, even about the royals. Queen jokes are a delightful way to combine the elegance of royalty with the joy of comedy. This article compiles 40 unique and side-splitting queen jokes that promise to bring a smile to your face. Whether you’re a fan of the British monarchy, a history buff, or simply in need of a good laugh, these jokes are sure to entertain.

Best Queen Jokes

1. Did you hear that Queen Elizabeth II may have made it to 96 before she died?
But Princess Diana made it to 120.

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2. Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
Queen.
(Queen who?)
Queen as a whistle.

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3. How do you know Liz Truss is a master at political chess?
She opened with a queen sacrifice.

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4. Why did Prince Andrew get the Queen’s corgis?
Because he’s the most experienced groomer in the family.

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5. What happens if you cross Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Phillip?
You die in a car accident in Paris.

6. At the royal gathering.
Meghan: What’s your secret to long life?
Queen Elizabeth II: Wear a seatbelt and don’t piss me off.

7. Why are there forecasts of drought in England?
Because the Queen rain has ended.

8. How does a queen in a straitjacket flip a light switch?
Off, with her head.

9. What did President Biden say after he was informed that the Queen has died?
“That’s a shame. I really liked their music.”

10. How was Queen Elizabeth II defying the rules of chess?
By outliving the king.

11. Why is the UK not returning Koh-i-Noor to India now that the Queen is no more?
If they start giving everything they robbed, The British Museum would be empty.

12. Why do UK people complain about bad weather?
Queen Elizabeth managed to get through 70 years and 214 days of continuous reign.

13. What do the Queen and Elvis have in common?
They both died on the throne.

14. Did you hear about the Queen’s burial in St. George’s Chapel, on the grounds of Windsor Castle?
People are just dying to get in there.

15. Why the other guests are supposed to pretend like nothing happened If Queen accidentally farts during dinner?
Noble gases should have no reaction.

16. How do you know that Queen was a Ronaldo fan?
Queen Elizabeth sat through Hitler, the Cold war, and the threat of Nuclear war but watching Ronaldo play in the Europa League is where she drew the line.

17. What’s it called when a King and Queen have no children?
A receding heir line.

18. What is the difference between turning 16 and turning 100 in the UK?
When you turn 100, you get a letter from the Queen and when you turn 16, you get a text from Prince Andrew.

19. What is the difference between Queen Elizabeth and Paul Walker?
Paul walker made it to 100 before he died.

20. What do you call a Russian homo who’s been knighted by the Queen?
Sergei.

See Also: 15 Hilarious Short Summer Jokes that Kids Will Love

21. Did you hear about the Queen’s death?
All British music is now Royalty-Free.

22. If there’s a king-sized mattress and a queen-sized mattress, where does the prince sleep?
The heir mattress.

23. Did you know Queen did Hip Hop too?
They had released a Bohemian Rap CD.

24. What do you get when you cross Prince Charles and Queen Elizabeth?
Dead in a tunnel.

25. Why is Chess banned under Islam?
They hate that the queen moves freely.

26. Why was the Queen in a hurry to get to the pool at Westminister?
She didn’t want to be late for her chlorination.

27. Why would the Queen let Netflix use her likeness in “The Crown”?
She probably gets royalties.

28. Where does the Queen keep her armies?
In her sleevies.

29. Why did the Queen go to the dentist?
She broke her crown.

30. How does the Queen of England open her front door?
With a monar-key.

31. How do French bees depose their queen?
Bee-capitation.

32. Did you hear that the queen has been on the throne for 70 years?
People had some long trips to the bathroom, but that seems extreme.

33. How does the Queen of England get around Buckingham Palace?
With a nobility scooter.

34. What did the Queen say when everyone left the hive?
“I don’t bee leave it.”

35. Why the Queen must be afraid of Thor?
Because thunder and lightning, very very frightening.

36. When the queen has to miss a royal event, what does she say?
“I’m sorry, I’ll have to take a reign check“

37. What kind of fee does the Queen of England charge when she knights someone?
A sir charge.

38. Why is the Queen always right?
Because she’s on the money.

39. What do you call gossip about kings and queens?
Royal tea.

40. Who is the queen of school supplies?
The Ruler.

Conclusion

Royalty and humor may seem like an unlikely pair, but queen jokes provide a delightful way to combine elegance with laughter. These 40 jokes span a variety of themes, from royal duties and regal pets to the queen’s personal hobbies and everyday life. By bringing a touch of humor to the world of monarchy, these jokes offer a refreshing and light-hearted perspective on a traditionally serious subject.

Whether you’re sharing a laugh with friends, brightening up a social gathering, or simply enjoying a moment of levity on your own, these queen jokes are sure to entertain and amuse. Laughter truly is the best medicine, and with a touch of royal wit, it becomes even more enjoyable. So, the next time you find yourself in need of a chuckle, remember these regal jokes and let the laughter reign supreme.

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