Thanksgiving is a wonderful time to gather with family and friends, share a delicious meal, and create new memories. However, as we all know, with that togetherness can come some lively conversations—and the occasional table argument. Light-hearted humor can go a long way in easing tension and turning potentially awkward moments into laughter. Here are 43 Thanksgiving table arguments jokes guaranteed to keep things light and festive. Keep these jokes on hand, and you’ll be ready to defuse any heated discussion with a laugh.
The Turkey Takes Center Stage
1. Why did the turkey join the Thanksgiving argument?
Because it wanted to give everyone a piece of its mind!
2. How did the turkey calm down the table argument?
It just said, “Let’s not ruffle any feathers.”
3. Why was the turkey not invited back after last year’s debate?
It kept gobbling up all the attention.
4. What did the turkey say to the vegetables during their food fight?
“Stop stirring the pot!”
5. Why did the turkey stay silent during the family feud?
It knew that gobbling only adds fuel to the fire.
6. How do turkeys avoid Thanksgiving table arguments?
They just wing it!
7. Why did the turkey interrupt the argument?
Because it was a real turkey shoot!
8. How did the turkey handle the political debate?
It decided to duck out early.
9. Why don’t turkeys ever argue at the Thanksgiving table?
They know that eventually, they’ll be roasted no matter what they say.
10. What did the turkey say when asked to mediate an argument?
“Sorry, I’m stuffed with my own problems!”
Family Feud Funnies
11. How do families avoid arguments at Thanksgiving?
They pass around the peace-eco-nutmeg.
12. Why was the family argument as heavy as the gravy?
Because everyone had thick skin!
13. What did Grandma say when politics came up?
“This table is only big enough for stuffing, not stuffed opinions!”
14. How does Uncle Joe end every argument?
By saying, “I’m always right…unless proven otherwise!”
15. Why did the mashed potatoes join the argument?
To prove that even they can be whipped into shape!
16. How do you know a Thanksgiving argument is serious?
When it starts before dessert!
17. Why did Mom threaten to leave the table?
She said, “I yam what I yam, take it or leave it.”
18. How do family arguments start at Thanksgiving?
With just a pinch of seasoning…and a dash of opinions!
19. Why did Aunt Betty bring a mirror to the table?
To show everyone they weren’t seeing things her way!
20. Why was the cranberry sauce offended during the argument?
It got caught in a jam!
Political Humor and Family Affairs
21. What’s the best way to handle political arguments at Thanksgiving?
Stuff the conversation with puns!
22. Why do politics and pumpkin pie mix poorly?
Too much sugar and spice to be taken seriously!
23. How did the family avoid a debate about who was right?
They all agreed to disagree, just like on the guest list.
24. Why did Grandpa switch sides mid-argument?
He said it was a turkey flip-flop!
25. How do you tell if an argument is political?
When everyone starts to carve out their own points.
26. Why did Dad hide the newspaper during the meal?
So that no one would be “headlined” as the family troublemaker.
27. What do mashed potatoes think about political debates?
They’re better off smooth and neutral.
28. Why did the gravy jump in on the political argument?
It wanted to “pour” its heart out!
29. How do you change the subject from politics to pie?
Ask, “Who’s for seconds?”
30. What did the apple pie say about the argument?
“You can’t just slice up opinions any way you want!”
Friendly Fire at the Dinner Table
31. Why did Aunt Sue bring a fire extinguisher?
She knew things were bound to get heated.
32. What’s the best way to cool down an argument?
Just sprinkle a little pumpkin spice in the air!
33. Why did the sweet potatoes join the argument?
They thought it was a family mash-up!
34. How did Cousin Ed end the argument?
He declared a truce by suggesting a toast—to the rolls.
35. Why did the casserole give up on settling the argument?
It said, “I’m already mixed up enough!”
36. What’s the best way to squash a debate at Thanksgiving?
Just say, “That’s it, who wants more squash?”
37. How did the turkey get out of the argument unscathed?
It simply gave everyone the cold shoulder.
38. What did the pumpkin pie do to diffuse the argument?
It told everyone, “You can slice it any way you want.”
39. Why did the stuffing get a little defensive?
Because it was fed up with all the accusations.
40. How did the cornbread respond to all the heated words?
It said, “I’ve got a crumby feeling about this.”
Dessert Diplomacy
41. What did the apple pie say to end the argument?
“How ’bout we all just chill?”
42. Why does pie never get involved in arguments?
Because it always comes last—and it’s the sweetest way to end things!
43. How do you know a Thanksgiving argument is over?
When everyone’s too full to talk!
Conclusion
Thanksgiving can be a tricky time with everyone’s different viewpoints coming together. But with the right touch of humor, these 43 jokes can be just the trick to lighten the mood and bring a smile to everyone’s face. This holiday, as you share your meal and a few laughs, may the only drama be a little too much whipped cream on your pumpkin pie! Happy Thanksgiving, and may your table be filled with love, laughter, and lots of laughter-filled bites.
Related Topics
42 Thanksgiving Relatives Arguing Over the TV Jokes
46 Thanksgiving Pumpkin Carving Jokes to Brighten Your Holiday