The holiday season brings joy, laughter, and plenty of opportunities to share jokes with friends and family. While we all know Santa Claus as a jolly figure who brings presents and spreads holiday cheer, there’s something inherently funny about imagining him indulging a little too much in the Christmas spirit—literally. These “drunk Santa” jokes add a humorous twist to the classic Santa persona, offering a lighthearted take on what might happen if the jolly old elf had a bit too much eggnog. From silly quips to clever punchlines, these jokes are guaranteed to make you and your loved ones laugh out loud. Whether you’re hosting a holiday gathering or just need a festive joke for your social media feed, these 45 jokes about a tipsy Santa will bring joy to your celebration.
1. Why did Drunk Santa bring a ladder to the party?
Because he wanted to raise the roof!
2. What did Drunk Santa say when he tripped over a present?
“I guess that’s what happens when you have too much ‘cheer’!”
3. Why does Drunk Santa always get lost on Christmas Eve?
He keeps following the wrong sleigh bells.
4. What’s Drunk Santa’s favorite Christmas carol?
“Jingle Bells… Jingle Bells… Jingle all the way to the bar!”
5. Why did Drunk Santa refuse to leave the North Pole?
Because he didn’t want to “sleigh” too far from home.
6. What did Drunk Santa say when he dropped a present?
“That’s what happens when you wrap a gift in ‘booze’ paper!”
7. Why does Drunk Santa like hanging out with reindeer?
Because they don’t judge his tipsy behavior.
8. What did Drunk Santa say to the elves when he showed up late?
“Sorry, I got caught up in a little ‘holiday spirit’!”
9. How did Drunk Santa keep the reindeer in line?
He kept offering them “liquid carrots.”
10. Why was Drunk Santa always so jolly?
Because he’d had one too many “rum and gingerbread” cocktails.
11. What did Drunk Santa say to Mrs. Claus after a wild party?
“Don’t worry, I’m just here to ‘sleigh’ the night away.”
12. Why did Drunk Santa wear sunglasses at the Christmas party?
Because he was trying to “hide his ho-ho-hangover.”
13. What was Drunk Santa’s favorite Christmas snack?
Anything that came with a side of “whiskey.”
14. Why did Drunk Santa forget his reindeer’s names?
He kept calling them by the wrong “spirit!”
15. How did Drunk Santa find his sleigh?
He followed the trail of empty beer cans.
16. Why did Drunk Santa miss a few houses on Christmas Eve?
He kept getting sidetracked by cookies and cocktails.
17. How does Drunk Santa stay awake all night?
He replaces milk with whiskey in every glass.
18. Why did Drunk Santa refuse to fly his sleigh?
He couldn’t find the reindeer without his “holiday GPS.”
19. What did Drunk Santa say when he knocked over the Christmas tree?
“I swear, it wasn’t me—it was the eggnog!”
20. Why does Drunk Santa only wear red?
Because it’s the only color that makes him look good after a few too many drinks.
21. What did Drunk Santa bring to the party?
A sack full of “spirit” and some really bad dance moves!
22. Why did Drunk Santa stop delivering presents halfway through?
He needed to “recharge his batteries” at the nearest bar.
23. What did Drunk Santa do when he couldn’t fit down the chimney?
He tried to “slide” down with a little help from his friends.
24. Why did Drunk Santa keep confusing his list?
Because it was too hard to “check twice” after one too many shots.
25. What’s Drunk Santa’s favorite type of music?
“Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree,” but only after a few drinks.
26. Why did Drunk Santa bring a karaoke machine to the North Pole?
He thought the elves would love to hear his “sleigh-ing” voice.
27. What did Drunk Santa say to the snowman?
“I’m not melting, you are—too much holiday cheer!”
28. Why does Drunk Santa always get the best presents?
Because he’s been “Santa-ing” all night long.
29. How does Drunk Santa deal with the pressure of the holidays?
He enjoys a few too many “holiday shots” and forgets about the stress.
30. What did Drunk Santa do when he couldn’t find the reindeer?
He hopped into a “sleigh” Uber.
31. Why did Drunk Santa leave the North Pole early?
He said it was too cold for a “warm-up drink.”
32. What did Drunk Santa say to Mrs. Claus?
“Baby, you’re the only one who can ‘wrap’ me up this holiday season.”
33. Why did Drunk Santa start dancing at the Christmas party?
Because he was “wrapped up” in the holiday spirit.
34. What did Drunk Santa say when he spilled eggnog on the rug?
“That’s what happens when you’re ‘eggnogged’ and ready to go!”
35. Why did Drunk Santa stop at every house?
He was on a “mission” to find the best Christmas punch.
36. How did Drunk Santa decorate his sleigh?
With “tinsel, lights, and a whole lot of booze!”
37. What did Drunk Santa say after eating too many cookies?
“Next year, I’m switching to a milkshake diet!”
38. Why was Drunk Santa such a terrible driver?
Because he kept mixing up his sleigh’s gas pedal with the brake.
39. How did Drunk Santa end up in the mall?
He thought it was the North Pole—just with a better bar.
40. Why did Drunk Santa take a nap during Christmas Eve?
He needed a “power snooze” before hitting more houses.
41. What did Drunk Santa say when he lost his hat?
“No worries, I’ve got more ‘caps’ than reindeer!”
42. Why did Drunk Santa keep forgetting to leave presents?
Because he kept getting distracted by all the “milk” and “cookies.”
43. How does Drunk Santa keep up with all the presents?
He relies on his “elves” to remind him—after a few drinks!
44. What did Drunk Santa say to the kids?
“Santa’s not the only one who’s been ‘naughty’ tonight!”
45. Why did Drunk Santa fall asleep in a snowbank?
He said it was the “perfect place to chill after a few rounds.”
Conclusion
Drunk Santa jokes add a hilarious and quirky twist to the traditional holiday humor. While Santa Claus is known for spreading joy and holiday cheer, imagining him as a bit tipsy provides a new and amusing perspective on the beloved character. These jokes are perfect for bringing laughter to your holiday gatherings and helping create a festive, fun atmosphere. Whether you’re at a family party or just need a quick laugh to share with friends, these 45 jokes will surely have everyone in stitches. So, this holiday season, remember to raise your glass and have a good laugh—just make sure to leave some eggnog for Santa too!
Related Topics
44 Twisted Christmas Jokes for You