Dad jokes are a timeless treasure of humor, but every once in a while, we stumble upon ones so hilariously messed up that you can’t help but laugh, even if you feel slightly guilty about it. In this article, we’ve compiled 46 of the most ridiculous and outrageous dad jokes for your entertainment. Get ready to cringe, laugh, and wonder how these ever made it into the dad joke arsenal!
1. What Did the Ocean Say to the Beach?
Nothing, it just waved.
2. Why Did the Scarecrow Win an Award?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
3. Why Can’t Your Nose Be 12 Inches Long?
Because then it would be a foot.
4. Why Don’t Skeletons Fight Each Other?
They don’t have the guts.
5. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn’t Yours?
Nacho cheese.
6. Why Did the Tomato Turn Red?
Because it saw the salad dressing.
7. Why Don’t Eggs Tell Jokes?
They’d crack each other up.
8. What Do You Call a Fish Wearing a Crown?
A kingfish.
9. Why Did the Bicycle Fall Over?
Because it was two-tired.
10. What Did One Plate Say to the Other Plate?
Lunch is on me.
11. Why Can’t You Give Elsa a Balloon?
Because she’ll let it go.
12. How Do You Organize a Space Party?
You planet.
13. Why Do Chicken Coops Only Have Two Doors?
Because if they had four, they’d be chicken sedans.
14. What Do You Call a Factory That Makes Okay Products?
A satisfactory.
15. Why Did the Math Book Look Sad?
It had too many problems.
16. What Do You Call Fake Spaghetti?
An impasta.
17. Why Did the Coffee File a Police Report?
It got mugged.
18. What Do You Call a Can Opener That Doesn’t Work?
A can’t opener.
19. Why Don’t Vampires Attack Taylor Swift?
Because she has bad blood.
20. How Do You Catch a Whole School of Fish?
With a bookworm.
21. Why Don’t Blind People Skydive?
It scares the dog.
22. Why Did the Golfer Bring Two Pairs of Pants?
In case he got a hole in one.
23. Why Was the Computer Cold?
It left its Windows open.
24. What Did the Buffalo Say to His Son When He Left?
Bison.
25. What’s Orange and Sounds Like a Parrot?
A carrot.
26. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Won’t Come Back?
A stick.
27. Why Can’t You Trust an Atom?
Because they make up everything.
28. What Did One Wall Say to the Other Wall?
I’ll meet you at the corner.
29. What Do You Call a Sleepwalking Nun?
A roamin’ Catholic.
30. Why Don’t Secret Agents Trust the Sun?
It always seems a little shady.
31. Why Did the Cow Go to Outer Space?
To see the Milky Way.
32. What Do You Call an Alligator in a Vest?
An investigator.
33. Why Don’t Ants Get Sick?
Because they have tiny ant-bodies.
34. How Does a Penguin Build Its House?
Igloos it together.
35. What Did the Zero Say to the Eight?
Nice belt.
36. Why Did the Picture Go to Jail?
Because it was framed.
37. What Do You Call a Snowman with a Six-Pack?
An abdominal snowman.
38. Why Did the Cookie Go to the Doctor?
Because it was feeling crumby.
39. Why Was the Math Teacher Such a Good Musician?
Because she had great chords.
40. What Do You Call a Belt with a Watch on It?
A waist of time.
41. Why Do Bees Have Sticky Hair?
Because they use honeycombs.
42. What Do You Call a Bear with No Teeth?
A gummy bear.
43. Why Do Birds Fly South for the Winter?
Because it’s faster than walking.
44. What Did the Farmer Say When He Lost His Tractor?
Where’s my tractor?
45. Why Was the Stadium So Cool?
It was filled with fans.
46. What Did the Grapes Do When They Got Stepped On?
They let out a little wine.
Conclusion
Messed-up dad jokes walk the line between cringeworthy and laugh-out-loud funny. These jokes, no matter how bad they are, remind us to take life a little less seriously and enjoy the humor in the simple things. Share these with friends, family, or coworkers and spread the laughter—even if it comes with a bit of groaning!
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