When the halls are decked, the trees are lit, and the eggnog is flowing, there’s no better time for a little holiday humor—especially the kind that sneaks in during bathroom breaks! Whether you’re waiting for the family bathroom to free up or simply looking for some festive chuckles in private, these Christmas bathroom jokes will bring laughter and joy to your… well, behind the scenes. With 48 side-splitting gags that blend bathroom humor with Christmas cheer, this collection is perfect for family fun, office parties, or anyone who thinks holiday humor belongs everywhere—even in the loo. So pull up your red-and-green toilet seat cover and get ready for some festively funny flushes of laughter.
48 Hilarious Christmas Bathroom Jokes for Holiday Giggles
1. Poop Deck the Halls
Why did Santa install a poop deck in his sleigh? Because he wanted to deck the halls… and then flush them!
2. Tinkle Bells
What’s the elves’ favorite bathroom song? “Tinkle Bells, Tinkle Bells, Tinkle All the Way!”
3. The Silent Plight
Why was the bathroom so quiet on Christmas Eve? Because not even a flush was stirring, not even a plop.
4. Sleigh My Smell
Why doesn’t Rudolph use the North Pole bathroom? Because it sleighs every time he lets one rip!
5. Wipe Christmas
Why did Santa carry toilet paper in his sleigh? He was preparing for a Wipe Christmas.
6. Elves on the Shelf, Not on the Seat
Why don’t elves use toilet seats? They prefer elf-respectable squats.
7. The First Wipe Noel
What do you call the first person to use the bathroom Christmas morning? The First Wipe Noel.
8. Santa’s Number Two List
Why was the bathroom labeled “Naughty”? Because it’s where Santa drops his number two list.
9. Festive Flushes
What do you call it when Santa flushes with flair? A festive flush!
10. Let It Flow
Why was the bathroom speaker playing “Let It Snow”? Someone misheard and thought it said Let It Flow.
11. Claus-trophobic Stalls
Why don’t reindeer like public bathrooms? They get Claus-trophobic in the stalls.
12. Pee-mas Carols
What do bathroom singers perform during December? Pee-mas Carols—they’re always a hit!
13. Reindeer Droppings
What did Dasher say when he came out of the bathroom? “Those were some serious reindeer droppings!”
14. Elf Yourself—And Wipe Too!
Why did the elf bring wet wipes to the party? Because he knows to Elf Yourself and then Wipe Yourself!
15. O Come All Ye Poopful
What’s the official bathroom hymn of Christmas? “O Come All Ye Poopful.”
16. Yuletide Splashdown
What do you call an overflowing toilet on Christmas? A Yuletide Splashdown.
17. Santa’s Secret Stinker
Why was Santa so quick in the bathroom? He was leaving a secret stinker and flying off.
18. No Loo at the Inn
Why did Mary and Joseph struggle in Bethlehem? Because there was no loo at the inn!
19. Wrapping Paper Woes
Why did the toilet paper get stuck in the chimney? It was wrapped too tight.
20. The Great Tree Tinkle
Why don’t cats pee under the Christmas tree? Because it causes a great tree tinkle.
21. Ho Ho Ho and Go Go Go
Why did Santa say “Ho Ho Ho” in the bathroom? Because it was time to Go Go Go.
22. Frosty the Blown-Man
Why did Frosty avoid beans at dinner? He didn’t want to become Frosty the Blown-Man.
23. The Flush Before Christmas
What do you call a midnight bathroom run on Christmas Eve? The Flush Before Christmas.
24. Nutcracker Noises
Why was the bathroom echoing with snaps and cracks? Because the Nutcracker was taking a dump.
25. Toilet Lid Tidings
What did the toilet lid say to the seat on Christmas? “Tidings of comfort and wipe!”
26. Wipe Wonderland
What did the snowman say in the restroom? “Welcome to the Wipe Wonderland!”
27. Chimney Clogs
What happens if Santa uses the toilet before the chimney? There’s a serious case of chimney clogs.
28. Merry Wizzmas
What do British Santas say during bathroom breaks? Merry Wizzmas!
29. Loo-La-La-Loo
What’s the elf opera called in the bathroom? Loo-La-La-Loo: A Christmas Pee-rformance.
30. Slay the Spray
Why do elves keep air freshener handy? To slay the spray after a curry dinner.
31. Jolly Rear-Ender
What happened when the elf backed into the tree? He became a jolly rear-ender.
32. Jingle Smells
Why did the toilet sing? Because someone dropped the beat—and the beans. Jingle Smells!
33. Tush the Night Before
Why couldn’t Santa sit comfortably? Too much chili before Tush the Night Before.
34. Flushed with Joy
Why did grandma cry in the bathroom? She was flushed with joy after the figgy pudding.
35. The Twelve Flushes of Christmas
What’s Santa’s post-feast tradition? The Twelve Flushes of Christmas—one for each helping.
36. The Pudding Plop
Why did the bathroom smell like dessert? Because of the pudding plop!
37. Reindeer Relief Room
Where do the reindeer go before a long flight? The Reindeer Relief Room.
38. Crappy Holidays
Why did the Grinch use all the TP? He wanted to wish everyone Crappy Holidays.
39. Slippery Sleigh Business
Why did Santa slip in the restroom? Some sleigh grease made for slippery sleigh business.
40. Flush Navidad
What do Spanish toilets sing during December? Flush Navidad!
41. Chestnuts Roasting (In the Loo)
Why did Grandpa run out of the bathroom? Chestnuts were roasting a bit too close in the loo!
42. No-Wipe December
Why do some people avoid TP in December? They’re doing No-Wipe December for charity.
43. Mistle-Toilet Trouble
What happens when you hang mistletoe in the restroom? Awkward Mistle-Toilet Trouble.
44. Elf-Sized Stalls
Why do elves hate human restrooms? Elf-sized stalls are hard to find.
45. Grandma Got Run Over by the Odor
Why did Grandma faint in the hallway? She got run over by the odor—post-Santa snack.
46. Candy Cane Clogs
Why do bathrooms hate Christmas treats? Too many candy cane clogs in the pipes.
47. Diaper in the Stocking
What did the baby elf leave for Santa? A diaper in the stocking—Merry Poopmas!
48. Holy Crap, It’s Christmas!
What did the plumber say on December 25th? Holy crap, it’s Christmas!
Conclusion
Bathroom humor and Christmas spirit might seem like a strange pair, but they flush together better than you’d think! These 48 jokes show that laughter doesn’t stop at the living room—it follows us into every nook and cranny, even the porcelain throne. Share them with family, friends, coworkers, or the elf on the shelf who could use a giggle. Whether you’re taking a break between presents or enjoying some solitude post-dinner, these festive flushes are sure to bring a smile to your holiday. Merry Giggles and Happy Bathroom Breaks to all!
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