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50 Funny Halloween Jokes to Make All Your Ghoul-Friends Laugh

by Hazel

As the air turns crisp and the leaves crunch underfoot, it can only mean one thing – Halloween is upon us! And what better way to celebrate this spook-tacular holiday than with a hearty dose of laughter? From ghostly gags to pumpkin puns, the world of Halloween jokes is as vast and varied as a haunted house. So, grab your broomsticks and prepare to cackle with delight as we dive into the ghoulishly funny realm of Halloween humor!

Very Funny Halloween Jokes

1. Where does the witch usually take her vacation? Anywhere that has a broom with a view.

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2. What do ghosts drink? Mountain Boo.

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3. Why did the ghost leave his job? He hated the graveyard shift.

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4. How did Dracula learn to be a vampire? He took a crash corpse.

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5. When’s the best time to cast a spell? The witching hour.

6. What do you call a cow on Halloween? A boo-vine.

7. How do you get rid of demons? Exorcise a lot.

8. Why does a witch ride a broomstick? So she can make a clean getaway.

9. What’s the best thing to put into a pumpkin pie? Your teeth.

10. What kind of bread do zombies like? Whole brain.

11. What’s a monster’s favorite cheese? Muenster.

12. Why was the cemetery chosen to be the perfect location to write a movie? Because it had great plots.

13. What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween? Candy corneas.

14. What do you call Ryan Gosling in a mummy costume? Ryan Gauzeling.

15. What position does the ghost play in soccer? Ghoul-keeper.

16. Have you heard about the poor witch who became a millionaire? It was a rags to witches story.

17. What do ghosts use to do their makeup? Vanishing cream.

18. What kind of rocks do ghosts collect? Tombstones.

19. How do ghosts send letters? Through the ghost office.

20. What do witches’ cats eat for breakfast? Mice crispies.

21. Why did the ghost starch his sheet? He wanted everyone scared stiff.

22. Where does a ghost go on vacation? Mali-boo.

23. Did you hear about the crazy vampire? He was totally batty.

24. Who’s in charge of the candy corn? The kernel.

25. What is a monster’s favorite pet? Creepy crawlies.

26. Why did the policeman ticket the ghost on Halloween? It didn’t have a haunting license.

27. When do cows turn into werewolves? During the full mooooooooon.

28. Why don’t mummies take time off? They’re afraid to unwind.

29. What does a ghost mom say when she gets in the car? Fasten your sheet-belts.

See Also: 49 Funny Old People Birthday Jokes to Celebrate Life

30. How do witches play loud music? On their broom boxes.

31. What did the ghost say when it fell down? It got a boo-boo.

32. What’s a werewolf’s go-to pickup line? Howl you doin’, good lookin’?

33. Do zombies eat burgers with their fingers? No, they eat the fingers separately.

34. What do you call a hip jack-o’-lantern? Waaay ahead of the carve.

35. Where do you find the spookiest sweets on Halloween? The ghost-ery store.

Halloween Jokes for Kids

36. What happened to the zombie who ran in the race? It came in dead last.

37. Why don’t skeletons skydive? They don’t have the stomach for it.

38. Which pumpkins work at the local pool? Life-gourds.

39. Why did the vampire get glasses? It was as blind as a bat.

40. Why couldn’t the witch make a speech? There was a frog in her throat.

41. Where do zombies live? On a dead-end street.

42. How do mummies start their letters? Tomb it may concern.

43. What does the witch ask her sisters the day after Halloween? Witch one of you has my candy?

44. Who’s the scariest body builder of all time? Dr. Frankenstein.

45. What do you call a broken Jack-o’-lantern? A crack-o-lantern!

46. What’s the biggest Halloween contest for moms? Mummy of the year!

47. What room do ghosts not need? A living room.

48. What kind of pants do ghosts wear? Boo-jeans!

49. What do you call two spiders who just got married? Newly webs.

50. Where do baby ghosts go during the day? To day-scare!

In Conclusion: Hauntingly Hilarious

Whether you’re carving pumpkins, bobbing for apples, or roaming the streets in search of candy, Halloween is a time for laughter and merriment. And what better way to spread some spooky cheer than with a bellyful of Halloween jokes? So, the next time you find yourself in need of a good chuckle, just remember – it’s always a treat to indulge in the delightfully frightful world of Halloween humor!

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