Thanksgiving is traditionally a time for family gatherings, hearty feasts, and expressions of gratitude. However, not everyone is content with the standard fare of wholesome stories and heartfelt toasts. For those who prefer their humor with a bit of an edge, dark Thanksgiving jokes can add a deliciously wicked twist to the holiday. Below, we’ve curated dark Thanksgiving jokes to tickle your funny bone—just make sure to share them with those who appreciate a more macabre sense of humor!
Dark Thanksgiving Jokes
1. What’s the favorite food of mathematicians for Thanksgiving? Pumpkin pi
2. What is hard, oddly-shaped, and brings you good fortune on Thanksgiving? A wishbone
3. What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children? If your father could see you now, he’d turn over in his gravy!
4. What did the stock boy tell the woman when she asked, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?” No ma’am they are dead.
5. Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive? It had 24 carrots.
6. Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk? To hatchet.
7. What do you wear to Thanksgiving dinner? A har-vest.
8. Why didn’t the cook season the Thanksgiving turkey? There was no thyme.
9. If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for? Their age.
10. What do you get when you divide the circumference of your jack-o-lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin Pi
11. Why did the farmer run a steamroller over his potato field on Thanksgiving Day? He wanted to raise mashed potatoes.
12. Why did the turkey cross the road? It was Thanksgiving Day, and he wanted people to think he was a chicken!
13. What is a turkey’s favorite dessert? Peach gobbler!
14. What do you get when you cross a turkey with a centipede? Drumsticks for everyone on Thanksgiving Day!
15. What did her daughter say when her mom wanted her help fixing Thanksgiving dinner? “‘Why? Is it broken?”
16. What’s the difference between a pirate and a cranberry farmer? A pirate buries his treasure, but a cranberry farmer treasures his berries.
17. Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel Prize? Because he was out standing in his field.
18. If you call a big turkey a gobbler, what do you call a small one? A goblet.
See Also: 40 Drunk Christmas Jokes To Keep You Jolly
19. Why do turkeys lay eggs? If they dropped them, they’d break.
20. What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo? A turkey that can pluck itself.
21. What would you call a pet squash? Call it anything you want; it won’t hear you!
22. What did the turkey say to the man who tried to shoot it? Liberty, Equality and Bad aim for all.
23. Why did the Pilgrims want to sail to America in the spring? Because April showers bring Mayflowers.
24. What did the turkey say before it was roasted? Boy, I’m stuffed!
25. What does an English turkey say to another English turkey on Thanksgiving morning? “To be or not to be roasted, that is the question.”
26. What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving Day? Quack, Quack!
27. What’s the best song to play while cooking a turkey? “All About That Baste”
28. What kind of weather does a turkey like? Fowl weather.
29. Why didn’t the pilgrim want to make the bread? It’s a crummy job.
30. What do you a call the age of a pilgrim? Pilgrimage
31. What do you get if you cross a turkey with a bell? A bird that has to wring its own neck.
32. What happened to the turkey whose feathers were all pointing the wrong way? He was tickled to death.
33. What did the salad say to the butter who kept making jokes? You’re on a roll.
34. What is something that describes both political talk and filling up your plate of food? Choosing sides
35. What is the difference between a chicken and a turkey? Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving
36. What should you say when your family begs you to stop making Thanksgiving jokes? “I can’t quit cold turkey!”
37. How is it possible that a turkey can end up with 3 legs even though it has only 2 legs? Because it had grown another foot.
38. What’s has feathers, a bowed head, and kneels? A turkey praying to not be eaten.
39. Why did the turkey get arrested and put into jail? Because of its fowl attitude.
40. Where do turkeys go to dance? The Butter Ball.
41. What do the Pilgrims, Indians and Puritans have in common? The letter “i”.
Conclusion
Thanksgiving, like any holiday, is what we make of it. Whether you prefer light-hearted jokes or something with a bit more bite, the key is to bring joy and laughter to the table. After all, the essence of Thanksgiving is about coming together, sharing a meal, and making memories—dark humor just adds an unexpected twist to the festivities.
In conclusion, dark Thanksgiving jokes offer a unique and often hilarious perspective on the holiday. By embracing this form of humor, we can add a new layer of fun to our celebrations, acknowledging both the light and dark sides of the season. Just remember to share these jokes with those who appreciate them, and you’ll be sure to have a Thanksgiving filled with laughter and maybe just a hint of wickedness.