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45 Harry Potter Jokes For Kids You Muggles Will Love

by Hazel

The enchanting world of Harry Potter has captivated audiences of all ages with its magical adventures, fascinating characters, and whimsical charm. Kids, in particular, are drawn to the fantasy and fun of Hogwarts, making it the perfect backdrop for some light-hearted humor. In this article, we delve into the realm of Harry Potter jokes designed especially for kids, showcasing a collection of 45 unique and enchanting jokes that will bring smiles and giggles to any young witch or wizard.

Harry Potter Jokes for Kids

1. Why can’t Harry tell the difference between a cooking pot and his best friend?
Because they’re both cauldron!

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2. Why does Severus Snape stand in the middle of the road?
So you never know which side he’s on!

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3. How does Harry Potter get rid of a rash?
He uses quit-itch…

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4. Why did Barty Crouch Jr quit drinking?
It was making him Moody!

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5. Why is Mad-Eye Moody such a bad professor?
He can’t control his pupils!

6. Why does Hermione carry a time-turner with her everywhere she goes?
Because she’s always running late for her Ron-dezvous!

7. What do you get when you cross the Harry Potter movies with the Batman movies?
“Why so Sirius?”

8. Why did the protons vote for Harry as class president?
They didn’t want to elect Ron!

9. What do you call an electrocuted Dark Lord?
Volt-demort.

10. How does Harry Potter enter a building?
Easy, he walks through a Gryffin-door!

11. How many Harry Potters does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one. He just holds the bulb in place and the world revolves around him…

12. Why couldn’t Harry find Hermione?
He was looking in all the Ron places!

13. What do you a Harry Potter fan riding a horse?
Harry Trotter.

14. Why does Voldemort prefer Twitter over Facebook?
Because the Dark Lord has followers, not friends.

15. Why doesn’t Snape teach Herbology?
Because he couldn’t even keep his Lily alive…

16. Why doesn’t Voldemort wear glasses?
Nobody nose!

17. Where can you find Dumbledore’s army?
Up his sleeve-y!

18. Why does Voldemort love Nagini so much?
Because she gives him loads of hugs and hisses!

19. How do you get into a magical gym?
You just walk through the dumbbell door…

20. How did Harry Potter get caught speeding?
He didn’t expect no patrol man!

21. What’s the difference between Harry Potter and a spelling bee contestant?
One conjures spells and the other spells conjure!

See Also: 35 BEST CAMP KNOCK-KNOCK JOKES FOR KIDS FUNNY AND PRINTABLE!

22. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
You know!
You know who?
That’s right. AVADA KEDAVRA!

23. What did Hermione do when Harry and Ron took the flying car to Hogwarts?
Finally relaxed!

24. Are you a dementor?
Because you just took my breath away…

25. Why did Snape give Harry Potter detention?
He was cursing in class!

26. How much did Harry pay to play his favorite sport?
A quid each.

27. Why do Slytherin students love Herbology?
Because classes are held in the green house!

28. How can you tell which wizards are pureblood?
They tell you!

29. What is Aragog’s favourite day of the week?
Fly-day!

30. What do the Battle for Hogwarts and Black Friday at Diagon Alley have in common?
The Weasley twins are 50% off!

31. Why did Harry Potter make a great computer programmer?
Because he spoke Python!

32. What is Harry Potter’s favourite type of drink?
Something gin-ey!

33. What do you call a house-elf in a hotel?
Dobby in a lobby!

34. Why does Neville need to use two cubicles in the bathroom?
Because he’s a Longbottom…

35. What do you call Quidditch players who live together?
Broom mates!

36. What type of fuel does Harry Potter use in his car?
Expecto petrolium!

37. How does Harry Potter get to the bottom of a hill?
By walking. Jk, rolling!

38. How many Hufflepuffs does it take to change a lightbulb?
All of them!

39. Why did the wizard cross the road?
“Crucio!”

40. Why did Harry Potter cross the road?
No reason, but someone will write a 200-page fan fiction about it!

41. In a world of magic, what’s the most unrealistic about Harry Potter?
A ginger having two friends.

42. What does Voldemort have in common with teenage girls?
A diary!

43. Why did Ron fall in love with Hermione?
Because he loves grangerous adventures!

44. Which social media app do Slytherins use?
Snapechat!

45. What does Harry Potter order at Starbucks?
Espresso Patronum!

Conclusion

The magical world of Harry Potter offers endless opportunities for fun and laughter, especially when it comes to jokes that kids can enjoy. From clever wordplay involving spells and potions to whimsical takes on the lives of beloved characters, these Harry Potter jokes are sure to bring a smile to the face of any young witch or wizard. So, whether you’re hosting a Harry Potter-themed party, reading the books, or watching the movies, keep these jokes handy to add a touch of humor to your magical adventures. After all, laughter is one of the greatest forms of magic!

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