Halloween is a time for spooky stories, creative costumes, and, of course, plenty of laughs. Whether you’re a ghost, a goblin, or a ghoul, these Halloween jokes are sure to bring a smile to your face and a cackle to your cauldron. Dive into our collection of 46 unique and hilarious Halloween jokes that will make your spooky season even more fun!
Short Halloween Jokes
1. How do vampires get around on Halloween? On blood vessels.
2. Why did the Headless Horseman get a job? He was trying to get ahead in life.
3. The skeleton couldn’t help being afraid of the storm—he just didn’t have any guts.
4. How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery? All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.
5. What do ghosts wear when their eyesight gets blurred? Spooktacles.
6. What can you catch from a vampire in winter? Frostbite.
7. What would be the national holiday for a nation of vampires? Fangs-giving!
8. Knock, Knock…
Who’s there?
Phillip!
Phillip who?
Phillip my bag with Halloween candy, please!
9. Why didn’t the skeleton go to prom? He had no body to go with.
10. Who did the scary ghost invite to his party? Any old friend he could dig up!
11. What’s a zombie’s favorite cereal? Rice Creepies.
12. What’s it like being kissed by a vampire? It’s a pain in the neck.
13. Where do ghosts go on holidays? The Boohamas.
14. What sound do witches make when they eat cereal? Snap, Cackle & Pop!
15. What did one ghost say to the other? Get a life!
16. Where do fashionable ghosts shop? Bootiques.
17. How do you know vampires love baseball? They turn into bats every night.
18. Knock, Knock…
Who’s there?
Witch!
Witch who?
Witch one of you will give me lots of Halloween candy?
19. Where do ghosts like to travel on vacation? The Dead Sea!
20. The skeleton didn’t mind that everyone called him a bonehead.
21. Why did the skeleton climb up the tree? Because a dog was after his bones!
22. What do skeletons fly around in? A scareplane or a skelecopter.
23. What did the fisherman say on Halloween? Trick or trout.
See Also: 43 Cheesy Halloween Jokes That Are More Silly Than Scary
24. What do you call a fat pumpkin? A plumpkin.
25. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don’t cry! I didn’t mean to scare you.
26. Why are ghosts so bad at telling lies? Because you can see right through them.
27. Where do baby ghosts go during the day? Day-scare.
28. What did the bird say on Halloween? Twick or tweet.
29. What did the mother ghost say to the baby ghost as they drove down the street? Buckle your sheet belt!
30. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Howl!
Howl who?
Howl you know unless you open the door!
31. What do you call two witches sharing an apartment? Broommates.
32. What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert? I scream.
33. What goes “Ha-ha-ha-ha!” right before a gigantic sounding crash and then keeps laughing? A monster laughing its head off!
34. What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? A sax-a-bone.
35. Why are graveyards so noisy? Because of all the coffin.
36. How do ghosts search the Web? They use ghoul-gle.
37. Why do demons and ghouls hang out together? Because demons are a ghoul’s best friend!
38. Wanna know why skeletons are so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin.
39. How do you fix a damaged jack-o-lantern? You use a pumpkin patch!
40. Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Cement.
Cement who?
Cement to scream when she saw Dracula but she fainted instead!
41. Why didn’t the zombie go to school? He felt rotten!
42. What has hundreds of ears but can’t hear a thing? A cornfield!
43. The skeleton canceled the gallery showing of his skull-ptures because his heart wasn’t in it.
44. What type of plates do skeletons like to use? Bone china.
45. What goes around a haunted house and never stops? A fence.
46. What did one thirsty vampire say to the other as they were passing the morgue? Let’s stop in for a cool one!
Conclusion
Halloween is a magical time filled with spooky fun, eerie tales, and plenty of laughter. These 46 short Halloween jokes capture the spirit of the season, bringing a light-hearted twist to the otherwise creepy festivities. Whether you’re telling them at a Halloween party, sharing them with friends, or just looking for a chuckle, these jokes are sure to entertain.
Remember, Halloween is about more than just scares and sweets—it’s about sharing moments of joy and laughter with those around you. So, keep these jokes handy, spread the laughter, and have a hauntingly hilarious Halloween!