Plumbing is a vital profession, but like any line of work, it has its lighter moments. Plumbers often find themselves in peculiar situations, and the humor that arises from their experiences can be both entertaining and relatable. Whether you’re a plumber yourself or someone who appreciates a good laugh, these 41 jokes are sure to brighten your day. Enjoy this collection of puns, quips, and witty observations about the world of plumbing.
Plumbing Jokes
1. What do you get when you combine the Sham Wow and a Snuggie? A reason to pee in your pants!
2. Why doesn’t Chuck Norris have to flush the toilet? He scares the sh*t out of it!
3. Why did they install a toilet at the garbage heap? Every one had to take a dump.
4.What do you call a country where everyone is pissed? A urination.
5. What did one toilet say to the other toilet? You look flushed!
6. Why don’t blondes bring their iPhones into the bathroom? Because they don’t want anyone to stealing their IP address!
7. What would you find in Superman’s bathroom? A Superbowl.
8. Why did the ant fall off the toilet seat? Because he was pissed off.
9. What makes a plumber smile anytime of day? Overtime pay.
10.What would a plumber like for their birthday? A pipe cleaning.
11. What would a plumber like after that? To lay some pipe afterwards.
12. What do plumbers have when they fall asleep? Pipe dreams.
13. What rocks while it flushes? A rocking chair toilet.
14. How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Ask them to pronounce unionised.
15. What do plumbers always say to customers? Each time you flush a toilet, you put food in my family’s mouth.
16. Do you know how a doctor and plumber are both alike? They both bury their mistakes.
17. What’s the difference between a doctor and a plumber? A doctor washes his hands after he has gone to the toilet, but a plumber washes his hands before.
18. Do you know how a body builder and a plumber are both alike? They both love pumping iron.
19. What’s the difference between a body builder and a plumber? A plumber’s pipes always stay hard.
20. Did you hear about the miracle of the blind plumber? He pick up a hammer and saw.
21. “A plumber is the only person who can take a leak while they fix a leak!”
22. “Someone has broken into our local police station and stolen the toilet. Right now the Police say they have nothing to go on…”
23. A plumber is the only guy I know who can take a leak and fix one too!
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24. What’s the one things you’ll never see a plumber do? Bite his nails.
25. Why does Australia need a lot of skilled plumbers? Because it is surrounded by water.
26. What draws so many Aussie’s to the plumbing industry? They love going down under.
27. What draws so many Aussie women to marry themselves a plumber man? They way he goes down under.
28. Plumbing is the only profession where you will here, “Be sure your joints have lots of dope in them”
29. What do you call a fairy using the toilet? Stinker bell!
30. How did the blind women parents punish her? They stuck a plunger in the toilet.
31. “A father was showing a new co-worker a picture of his five sons. His friend asked What they did for a living. The father said the older two are doctors and the youngest two are lawyers. The friend asked about the middle son and the father said, “Oh, he’s a plumber. Someone had to pay for all the others’ educations.”
32. A man at a train stop shows off pictures of his three sons to a friend. “What do your boys do for a living?” asked the man. “Well my youngest is a neurosurgeon and my middle is a lawyer,” He replied. “What does the oldest do?” the man asked. The father replied, “He’s the plumber that put them through school.”
33. A Texan is admiring Niagara Falls. As the tremendous amount of water flows over the falls, a local walks up to the Texan and says, “I bet you don’t have anything like that where you are from.” “No we don’t,” admits the Texan, “But we have plumbers that can fix it!”
34. A prestigious neurosurgeon calls a plumber to tend to his leaky faucet. The problem requires an easy fix and the entire job takes less than two minutes. Before leaving, the plumber says, “That will be $200.”
The surgeon replies, “I am a surgeon and even I do not charge $100 a minute.”
The plumber says, “Yeah, I didn’t either when I was a surgeon. Why do you think I switched?”
35. A doctor calls his local plumber late at night to fix a clogged sink. The plumber complains that he has regular hours but the doctor explains, “I get called into work late all the time, so you can too.” The plumber gives in and arrives a half hour later. Upon arriving, the plumber looks at the sink but is clearly uninterested in it. He hands the doctor two aspirin and says “I have a golf match to get to. Take two and call me in the morning.”
36. A local doctor called a plumber out in the middle of the night because one of his toilets was blocked. He insisted that it was urgent and needed to be attended to immediately. Upon arrival the plumber lifted the toilet lid, threw in two aspirins, and said ‘If it’s still there in the morning, give us another ring.’
37. A lad is admiring the Niagara Falls when a local approaches him and says, ‘Bet you’ve got nothing like that where you come from.’ ‘No,’ admits the resident. ‘But we’ve got plumbers who could fix it.’
38. A dog goes into a Plumbers Merchants and says, “I’d like a job please”. The owner says: “We don’t hire dogs, why don’t you go join the circus?” The dog replies, “What would the circus want with a plumber?”
39. What did the poo say to the fart? You blow me away.
40. Why did the elephant go in the men’s room? He wanted some nuts.
41. When does Denzel Washington have hang out with Rugrats? Potty Training Day.
Conclusion
Plumbing might not be the first profession you think of when it comes to humor, but as these jokes show, there’s plenty of room for laughter in the world of pipes and faucets. Whether you’re dealing with a small leak or a major plumbing disaster, a good joke can lighten the mood and make the job a bit more enjoyable. So next time you find yourself in need of a plumber, remember these plumber jokes and share a smile with the person fixing your pipes. After all, laughter is the best way to flush away any stress!